Kids,

Bow in the presence of greatness. Bow in the presence of Fake Steve. Bow, bow bowwow wowow wow WOW! He has me wet, baby! You know how we love to see nude celebs; well, he just snapped off Google’s halter top with an expert flick of his thumb and index.

I’ll tell you who makes money on AdSenseless. Google. You little scrappy website owner you, how much moolah do you rake, huh? Pittance. Unless you’re a wham-bam-thank-you-spam splog and believe me a lot of you idiots click onto those websites. Yet we all sign up for such a service in the hope of making money off the blog.

Which IDIOT clicks on these ads? Who wants to see more ads? I’ll tell you why you fuckers don’t mind seeing ads on websites. BECAUSE YOU GET THE CONTENT FOR FREE! Or so you think, while this surrepticious “google analytics” collects your information, only to sell it to companies. Makes you feel like they’re just one big fucking “telemarketing” gig that got lucky with ads online. True, they came up with text ads and I’ll give them props for that idea.

But Fakey Stevey lists a shit load of other ventures that generate no cash. Google Pack, Earth, Orkut, Maps, Street View (aieee!), Ride Finder, Transit, Checkout blah blah blah generate no cash today. They also won’t generate cash tomorrow, unless Eric is a reptillian who knows how the world is going to be in 10 years and he is just laying the foundations for it now. I find that likely, er, not.

As long as you cheapsters click on those silly ads, Google will thrive. Not only will it thrive, but it will continue to puff up the little arrogant heads of those “oh look @ me, I’m smarter than you” gerks (geeky jerks). YouTube is “the biggest no brainer in the history of the earth” because (for a short period of time), a bunch of kids threw money (actually the investors did) at hosting these videos long enough for Google to think it was worth the chump change. After that who cares? SHAME on you Google shareholders. You let these guys bask in the glory of their superheated egos, while all you do is froth at the mouth at the unbelievable valuations.

Maybe Google will buy this blog and rename it “Google No.Bullshit”. Heck, I’ll sell for a million bucks and free food at their “Googleplex” (goddddddddd!)